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Funemployed not so fun?

When I first moved back to London after uni I was on Cloud 9. I felt like the world was my oyster and I was going to fall into my dream job by September latest.
Well it's now October and the realities of graduate life have hit home. It's not that I was necessarily arrogant, but more so ignorant.

I was living in a bubble of uni life where my parents, extended family and all of their friends would praise me for studying at university and I didn't anticipate that once my graduation ceremony was out of the way, I was just an unemployed person doing very little.

I've spent months applying for so many dream jobs, applying for rubbish jobs, random jobs, looking to sack it all off and move abroad for a bit and feeling too emotionally exhausted to apply for any jobs and diverting all conversations in that region to something else, or about someone else. You can see my emotional rut.

At the start of summer people would ask me what it is I want to do and I would be bursting with confidence and answers: 'I want to work in social media professionally. I want to intern and work my way up. I plan on applying for startups, food companies, london based magazines and getting all the experience to become a social media savvy writer'.
 However, since then it's like I've lost sight of those dreams and find it difficult to conjure up that answer. I think the 'funemployed' life can really suck you in and make you forget your true ambition.

Yet, despite all of this complaining and what is now becoming quite a moody post, I do believe that things will fall into place eventually. I've been trying to do more to change my attitude and make it more positive. Like not applying for jobs in my bed; it's not productive, I just get miserable and lethargic and it makes allowance for this stagnation which is unhealthy. Instead, I'm doing what I did during uni and going out of the house to work (or apply for jobs), whether that be in a cafe or a hotel. That way, as pretentious as this sounds, I'm changing my energy and directing my thoughts in a more outward, productive way.

I'm also trying to take better control of my finances by getting a Monzo card. Money can be a major downer when it's tight and sometimes holds you back from seeing friends and enjoying life. So by taking a more proactive approach to my finances I feel that it will be less of a downer in my funemployed life.

I'm also trying to do at least 2 applications a day. If I'm not applying, I won't get anywhere so I want to make sure that I stay motivated and driven by applying. For too long now I have looked at job specs and seen one skill I don't have and exited the page. That just isn't good enough. Statistically, men apply for roles when they only have 60% of the skills required whereas women tend to only apply if they have 100% of the skills required (Harvard Business Review). And we wonder why men are in more jobs? I haven't meant for this to turn all feminist but I see that I lack the confidence when it comes to jobs which my male counterparts may possess. This is quite frankly doing a disservice to myself and I need to learn to turn negatives into positives and go for those jobs that I can do, but need the confidence for.

Finally, I am trying to keep doing stuff I enjoy. Going back to finances, when money is low it feels like I don't deserve to see my friends or have a nice time, but actually I really do. So many of my posts are about how to enjoy London on the cheap and I know that I can do it, as can you. A major part of my life is being a Tastemaker, blogging and seeing my friends and without those things I am not whole and therefore it's so important I don't stop doing them.

This post is all about what I'm going through at the moment, and I know I haven't been a graduate for long but it is easy to fall into a dark place when you lose that educational structure. However, I am taking steps to drag myself out of this place and to be a bit kinder to myself as the funemployed life should be fun and I need to have a bit more faith in myself.

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